Thursday, March 02, 2006

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

I'm usually i'm a positive person, but lately i've just been feeling a little negative and down. Now, I don't really have a lot to be upset about. My life is really fucking good. The situations i'm getting upset about are just so damn meaningless - and that in turn is making me view myself as a whiny little bastard. It doesn't matter what you do, you'll always have problems - but as my mom always said, there's someone out there worse off than you - so shut the hell up and eat your cereal. Her advice for fear of flying was even better, and i'm quoting her directly here - "...dying in a plane crash is whole lot better than getting ass cancer and having to shit in a bag..."

Have I ever mentioned that I love my mom?

Everyone needs to rant a little, and i'm good about not doing that. So let's break that cycle - here are the five trivial things that are upsetting me today;

1. Real life pop culture scenese reproduced in LEGO. I saw a LEGO re-creation of Steve Jobs at an Apple press conference. Seriously, that is awful - and I love LEGO and Apple, but that is just going to far. There are Star Wars and Matrix scenese redone in LEGO too - stop it.

2. People who forget to install SQL Server 2000 service packs and then wonder why the system doesn't work.

3. Guys who wear polo shirts with the collars up. You should be beaten.

4. American Idol. Not because of Paula or Ryan or Randy or Simon. Because i'm tone deaf and I'm jealous.

5. Myself for never writing thank you cards to people. Karen stayed here for two days last week because she had an interview at law firm in Kitchener. I barely knew she was here. Then we get a thank you card with a gift certificate to the LCBO (liquor store) from her. I have been shamed.

On a lighter note, I must recommend that everyone go out and buy "Hefty Fine" by the Blood Hound Gang. Most of you will know them by their one big MTV hit "The Bad Touch" from their 2000 release "Hooray for Boobies". Wow. That title pretty much sums up their music for you. My personal favourite track is "You're Pretty When You're Drunk" off 1995's "Use Your Fingers". Funny story, I was introduced to this band by one of my friend the Conquistador's ex girlfriends. We drove across the state one day to get tickets to a concert (I guess they didn't have Ticketmaster) and she had their first two CD's and we rocked out across Alligator Alley to them. How is that funny? Oh, she wanted me and this guy to have make out so she could watch and then join in. Now I love my friends - but I don't LOVE my friends. He could really pick 'em back in the day.People just find me attractive I guess. I'm downloading "Hefty Fine" right now from iTunes and already, my #1 song pick is the single "Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo". It's got a great beat you can dance to.

7 days of being in my 20's left. Better drink up.

See you on the flip side.

2 comments:

Reverend Moloquin said...

I'm going to hijack your Bloodhound Gang thread and put a vote in for their version of "It's Tricky". Possibly one of the best cover tunes of all time.

And don't worry about turning 30...It only hurts for a second.

Ender said...

I'll jump in here too. I signed up today just so I could make this comment...

I waited for Hefty Fine to come out and ended up disappointed. As opposed to buying/downloading all of the tracks, I think everyone should just go get the Foxtrot single. Also, for those who haven't heard of Bloodhound Gang, I suggest buying/downloading their albums in this order...

1) One Fierce Beer Coaster
2) Use your Fingers
3) Hooray for Boobies