Friday, April 14, 2006

suburb of the damned

Happy Easter. I've only eaten a little chocolate this morning and all ready I'm feeling the effects of chocoverdose. The question of "what does a giant rabbit delivering chocolate eggs" have to do with the resurrection of the Jesus has been asked a thousand times over - by people far more knowledgeable than me - so i'll just skip it and move on to another question.

Why the hell is CityTV showing the 1995 version of "Village of the Damned" on Easter Sunday? I'm not a religious person - but even I find this a little odd - entertaining - but odd. I know that "The Ten Commandments" and "Spartacus" were on last night - but the networks must have some other over played Easter-themed programming available. What constitutes a village? Is it a certain population? Does it mean having a small church and school and general store and white haired, red-eyed alien children who can control your mind? Is there a national census count on the number of these children so I know where not to live?

I found some stills from John Carpenter's "They Live" on some website - can't remember the name right now. In the film, aliens have taken over society and have subliminal messages in all advertising - these messages are meant to make humans submissive and super consumers. Isn't that what all advertising does? Even for me - i've given up fast food - and Taco Bell commericals still make me want to drive over there and get some tacos. Hmmmm....tacos.

Ok - I need to get some socks - Easter dinner time. Éirí Amach na Cásca.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

The following takes place between 6pm and 7pm

Have we set a date? Set a date? For god's sake, we only got engaged yesterday. Yesterday, as in the day before today - two days before tomorrow. Hey, I'm an attention whore - I love well wishes and congratulations, slaps on the ass, etc... but if you're going to ask a question like that, well, I'm going to have to answer you sarcastically. We've even got the "when are you going to have kids" question. Kids? Slow down - let's have a ceremony, reception, and after party and then maybe three to four years before that even comes up. I can't even take care of my imaginary friend Gavin the dog, let alone a baby.

Continuing with this narcissism, here's the story of how I asked. There were many suggestions made on how to propose, some of which were ok and many others that were absolutely not going to work. The "take her out to dinner" routine would not work, as i'm a cheap bastard and she'd know something was up. "Take her out to dinner"'s cousin "make a nice dinner" wouldn't work either - for I can only make four dishes -

1) Pechuga a la plancha con friojles negros y maduros
2) Chicken Curry
3) Cajun chicken pasta (which tastes and looks like it's from Chilis)
4) Risotto

If I made anything else, it would not be seen as a culinary experiment, it'd be that I was up to something. Going on a "special trip" wouldn't work - as that would give it away too. In fact, pretty much anything out of the ordinary (work, drinking, volleyball, bathroom cleaning) would give it away. This is where the story begins....

I decided the best way would be to attach the ring to a wine charm on my wine glass - so that when we're having a glass of wine, she'd notice and then I would ask. There were problems with this plan already - the first being that we don't put wine charms on our glasses. The break came for me a couple weeks ago when Laurie complained that I hold her glass wrong and leave finger prints on it. The light bulb went off in my head - if I start using wine charms now, she won't notice anything out of the ordinary when I make my move. So for the last month or so, i've been using wine charms on the glasses - i'm very Jack Bauer in my planning.

I decided that yesterday would be the day. Laurie was at a volleyball tournament all day - and when she would get home, I knew she'd want a glass of wine. I spent the day cleaning the bathroom (one of my favourite hobbies - it could have been the lead paint in my crib growing up) and generally making the house look nice. But not TOO nice. I left some crumbs on the kitchen counter, and I pee'd on the toilet seat to throw her off my plans.

She gets home from volleyball and sure enough, she asks for a glass of wine. I place the wine charms on the glasses, the ring on mine. We're on the couch, watching the news - commenting on current events, you know - the usual. At first, I was pretty nervous. Thankfully my years of watching "24" prepared me for how to deal with situations like this. For the first glass of wine, I kept my hand over the base of the glass. As the wine continued to pour, I became more and more bold with holding my glass - showing the ring and even at one point swining the glass so that the ring would move from the back of the base to the front - right in her line of sight.

She didn't notice.

The bottle of wine was now empty. I asked if she'd like another glass - she did - so bottle #2 was opened. We continue watching the news, talking about what's going on in the world, blah blah blah - and she still doesn't notice. Now this is not some ten caret giant rock - but it's not small either - how she didn't notice was blowing my mind. After about thirty minutes, I noticed that the second bottle was getting empty. I'd hadn't eaten since lunch - so I had a huge buzz - so much so that I began laughing. Laurie asked what I was laughing at - and I just told her it was a private joke. Thankfully, she didn't ask what it was about. At this point - if I didn't ask, there was a good chance I might go for bottle #3, and then there'd be no way I could ask - so I said "...hey, aren't you glad there aren't finger prints on your glass?"

She said yes, she was glad.

"That's because I use wine charms. Look at my wine charm."

Finally, she noticed the ring and I was able to ask and she said yes. Mission accomplished. What made the night even better was that we went to dinner at Sole at it's "Mexican Festival" time there - so we had margaritas and enchiladas. What's better than enchiladas? Giant rabbits. Photo Credit - (AFP/File/Michael Urban)

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Got a problem

Normally the O.C. would be making me mad. It is Thursday night and Seth is acting like a fucking idiot and Micha Barton keeps complaining, blah blah blah. To be honest, i'm not even watching this episode. I was cleaning upstairs and took a short photo album looking break. There are photos from the last couple weddings i've been to and it reminds me of one thing that annoys the shit out of me - people who don't make a small attempt to dress up for a wedding.

- Seriously, does it take that much effort to put on a tie?
- Do you own a pair of pants that fits and aren't hanging off your ass?
- Do you own a pair of pants that aren't jeans?
- Do you own a dress other than the dress you wore to prom fifteen years ago?

It's not like you have to drop $1450 on a Hugo Boss suit - i'm not saying that at all. Even a shirt and tie and slacks is great - and it shows that you took a moment to make yourself look nice on whoever's "special" day. I've been to a couple weddings were the invitation specified "black tie" or "formal" and people showed up with untucked shirts and jeans. If there was such a thing as a wedding bouncer, i'm sure they'd be in big demand. Weddings should be a like a club - dress code enforced.

Ok - Seth didn't get into Brown, so he lies to Summer and says he just doesn't want to go and then she breaks up with him. Now Sadie is breaking up with Angry Ryan because she feels she'll be a dead weight on him at university. Now she's walking alone down the beach - really safe lady. Oh, why do I watch this show? It's Peter Gallagher's eyebrows - they're very hypnotizing. Now Peter Gallagher has just pissed off his wife - it's not a good day for the guys of the O.C. Summer is tearing up a collage she made - uh oh, this is serious. Of course Micha Barton has to have a pink Berkley hoodie. I'm so judgemental of fictional characters.

Anyway - i've gotten off subject. Dress nicely for special occasions, that's all i'm saying. Can anyone lend me $1450 for a Hugo Boss suit?

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

CN Tower

Originally uploaded by alexkinsella64.
I'm trying out this post photos from flickr thing - seems to work pretty damn cool.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Friendly Reminder

This is a photo of my friends Rufus (on the right) and Vern (on left) eating loco moco over in Wailuku. Loco moco is a hamburger patty server over fried rice, covered with a fried egg and gravy. It's typically eaten at breakfast. Yes, this is what you have for breakfast. I've had a lot of dishes in my life that I would say almost stopped my heart - loco moco is close to the top of the list. Loco moco is another reason why Hawai'i is the best state in the union - followed by a close second Wisconsin. The badger state has brats and an amazing collection of beers - and even though it lacks an ocean, it does have Lake Menona and Lake Mendota surrounding Madison - oh, and that great lake. I don't count the great lakes - it's a long story.

I've bought a season pass to season 10 of South Park on iTunes. I feel like such an Apple whore. I own an iPod (a regular b&w one) and I'm borrowing my dad's spare iBook - but to be honest, i'm a Dell whore at heart. It is not that I have a problem with Apple (I do own the previously mentioned iPod), it's just that having one would be useless for what I do. There's no edition of Visual Studio 2005 for OS X. Last I checked, there's no SQL Server 2005 OS X. If I was a photographer or a graphic designer then sure, i'd own an Apple. I'd buy one of those fancy MacBook Pro laptops with a shit load of RAM and a fancy case with an Apple logo on it. But alas, i'm a C#/VB/SQL developer - so i'm buying another Dell. I currently own a Dell Dimension 4100 which is almost five years old. She's served me well through these past years - she even survived a small fire and the move to Canada - but time has taken it's toll.

I'm actually looking at one of their Inspiron 6400 with that funky Intel Core Duo processor. Shopping doesn't come easy for me - I suffer from post cognitive dissonance, more commonly known as buyer's remorse. I learned that the term post cognitive dissonance from my girlfriend. I don't know why, but it sounds very sexy when she says that. I'm a weird guy.

Mahalo for reading this and have a great day.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

something spooks the heard

I thought it was 9:30, but it's 10:30. Daily savings time has snuck up on me again - even though i've heard "spring forward, fall back" over a thousand times in the last week.

I'm still recovering from the Elmira Maple Syrup Festival. I had two giant pancakes and a bbq chicken leg. If you're wondering what chicken legs have to do with maple syrup, well then join the club. We got to Elmira around 9am and the falafel, pita, gyros, sausage, chicken strip, funnel cakes, and fudge stands were already open for business and doing a busy trade. As we walked down the streets, I couldn't help but wonder what would possess someone to eat a spicy Italian sausage covered in onions at 9am. Well - I quickly found out. The 1/4 mile line to get pancakes is what would cause someone to give up on delicious, syrupy pancakes and just wait in line for 2 minutes to get a maple burger with cheddar cheese and fried onions. The giant pancake line did not deter us from our goal - and a oddly quick twenty minutes later, we were enjoying our pancakes in a 45 degree light rain storm.

After downing a coffee and chocolate milk, we made our way back to the main festival area in search of more food. I had earlier seen some people setting up chicken in a giant smoker. It smelled amazingly good, so I made my way around the varying booths until I found where the chicken was being sold. $3 dollars for a chicken leg - fantastic, and damn delicious if I may say. Laurie decided on the back bacon on a bun with onions - an equally good choice. After that, our arteries started to clog, so we decided to head back to Waterloo.

Later, after naps and oddly - more food - Laurie, Krissy, and I went out to McMullens and Ethel's for a couple drinks. We could have walked back, but owing to consumption and the cold weather - we called a cab.

Thanks to daylight savings - we've lost an hour of sleep. I'm wide awake, i've done two loads of laundry - i'm posting - it's not even noon yet. There was talk of making waffles this morning, but the people who would make the waffles are still sleeping. So here I am, no waffles, clean clothes and watching "Alien Planet" on the Discovery Channel.

I'm off to Home Depot. See you (and my money) later.