- I am not from New York City's upper west side.
- My family is not old money.
- At no point have I attended a private school or attempted to gain entrance to an ivy league university.
- I do not live in a hotel.
- A mysterious girl does not live blog about me.
Live blog? Mysterious girl? The odd part about this show is the voice over by the titular "Gossip Girl", who is never revealed on screen. Who is? What is her motivation? Does she get a lot of money from those Google AdSense ads when NYC's finest click to get the latest dirt on their friends?
Now, you'll slap me - but I believe this the an attempt to create a "LOST"-esque mystery. While I've not read the books that "Gossip Girl" is based on, I've thought about this mystery enough to come up with my own theories. My first theory is that Gossip Girl is actually in the future, and she's pre-dating her blog entries. Why? In order to warn the spoiled students at the Constance Billard and St. Jude's School for Boys of their dangerous ways. Don't buy that? Second theory - Gossip Girl is the Interweb after it attains sentience. New York City has hundreds of CCTV cameras for post security (or spying, depending on your interpretation), it could be conceivable that the Gossip Girl/Interweb can control them all to spy on rich teens. Why? In order to find suitable hosts for the nanities it has developed to make an army of attractive cyborgs. Think about it - pre-ivy league elite - get to them when they're young and then the Gossip Girl/Interweb can take over the world.
Call me crazy.
That was rhetorical.
My friend Randy Smith took a photo of a police car that crashed into the liquor store near where I used to live. I added LOLCAT tags to it.